sibuk.. kuliah, kerja, greja.. sibuk banged! tp seneng sih, kerja is like my escape from my boring daily routine.. ktemu orang* baru, temenan ma orang* baru, blajar hal* baru.. its so much fun! lagian, kesibukan is a way to stop urself from thinking too much! masalahnya gw tuh seseorang yg suka [terlalu banyak] berpikir.. i make up scenarios in my head.. eh havent i talked about this bfore?

yah anyway, im really glad gw sibuk skrg, karna at the moment ada bbrp hal yg, if i had time, i would think so much about.. hal* ngga penting.. haha.. so im glad that im way too busy to think about these stuff.. otherwise nti gw depresi lagi.. ngapain.. menyusahkan diri sendiri.. but, having said that, ada koq bbrp hal yg msiiii aja gw pikirin.. like my last entry.. hhahaha..

tapi.. senangnya menjadi orang sibuk..

i think at one point you feel like you've just had enough of making excuses for people that even you are starting to doubt yourself.. what used to be your source of comfort is now just a lie.. then, whether you admit it or not, you start to wonder whether all this time you were making a fool out of yourself by making excuses for other people..

having said that, loe juga nyadar klo mgkn slama ini apa yg eloe rasain itu bukan bohong, bukan tipuan, dan loe yakin itu smua emang nyata, not just a fragment of your imagination.. tp yah.. namanya manusia ya.. there's only so much you can take.. there's a limit to everything.. gw sih skrg cuma maw take it one day at a time.. dan gw ngga berenti make excuses for people, karna ya itu, i want to avoid getting hurt..

getting extremely tired though..

disitu tlalu jauh.. mesti ngelewatin samudra dan benua..
naik kapal laut bsa sampe tua, naik pesawat duitnya ngga ada...
lagian lg sibuk*nya kyna ngga mgkn cao gtu ajah..
coba klo seandainya gw kaya trus bsa afford to buy a plane ticket..
cabut for the weekend, kan libur 4 hari.. cuti kerja..
ataw ngga klo gw bsa terbang.. lbh enak lagi.. i can go whenever i want..
tp cape kli ya klo terbang ndiri?

hmm pintu kmana aja would be nice too.. that would be the best actually..
cm ksini klo kuliah, ataw kerja, ataw greja.. slain itu ngga ush ada dsini..
kangen banged deh.. the smells, the traffic, the people.. smuanya..
some people would kill to be here, but i would kill to be there..
emang manusia ngga pnah puas ya..
coba klo gw bsa terbang..

cape...

im getting tired of pretending im tough..

they say curiosity kills the cat. it certainly killed me.
well its not the curiosity itself that killed me, but the answer that i stumbled upon because of that curiosity. bodoh. now i feel so insecure. takut. sebel. marah.

hopefully all goes well and nobody gets hurt.

ari ini, seorang kawan yg sudah lama menghilang dari peredaran n tiba* nongol lg n ngajak gw cetting kept repeating the same sentence: "gw bosen!"

trus gw jd mikir.. hey i used to be like that.. bgtu ga ada kerjaan, bgtu d rmh aja ngga pgi*, lgsg deh.. "duuhh boseeennnn.." tp skrg klo d pikir*, udh bosen gw blg bosen.. iyah, perasaan bosen itu msi dateng, tp gw REFUSE untuk blg klo gw bosen, karna menurut gw bosen itu mindset kita doang. semakin kita ngomong klo kita bosen, kita akan semakin bosen. iya ga sih?

gw dulu emang seneng banged pgi*, klo d rmh bosen.. skrg tuh gw sukaa bgt ngerem d rmh. drpd pgi* ngga jelas, buang duit, mendingan gw diem* aja d rmh.. n gw ngga maw lg ngomong klo gw bosen. nti jd kebyasaan sih.. trus jd bosen beneran. kan katanya whatever you say you are, you are completely right.

theres a couple of things yg gw kerjain klo gw bosen:
+ blog walking
+ nge blog
+ lyat* friendster
+ baca buku [novel keq, komik keq, apalah]
+ brusaha melupakan klo gw lagi bosen

hehe.. hope that works for u guys too... :D

kesel! memory card hape gw corrupted scara tiba* n therefore SMUA isinya ilang. untung foto* udah k backup k kompie. but all my ringtones n videos are GONE.. sediiihh.. seddiiiihhh.... :( :(

gw rasa yang namanya gengsi itu yang bikin dunia kaya gini sekarang.. nih ya, the things that ego can do (feel free to add to the list!):

1. bikin orang ngga maw ngaku klo udh salah n instead malah maksa argue case dya yg ngga make sense n bikin orang pengen ngamuk*
2. bikin orang ngga maw ngaku klo dya sayang ataw punya feeling untuk seseorang n in the end malah d tinggalin ma tu orang "it's better to lose ur pride with the one u love, than to lose the one u love because of ur useless pride"
3. bikin orang smakin nyasar karna malu bertanya walau udh taw dya nyasar!
4. bikin orang bete soalnya d marah*in gara* dya malu klo udah salah
5. bikin kejadian hal* yang ngga penting gara* ego nya dya itu!

yah.. sekian dulu yg kepikiran at the moment.. but like i said, feel free to add anymore! :D